Friday, July 3, 2009

"The Mommy Wars" Round 2: Stay at Home Moms vs. Working Moms

Posted by Angiefairbanks at 5:45 AM

Round two of "The Mommy Wars" is here. The topic for today is stay at home moms vs. working moms. The is the original "Mommy War." This debate has been going on forever. I have done a lot of research on this particular topic and have been thinking about it for about a week, since I have decided to write about it. I am finding myself not knowing where to start. But one thing I have learned through all of this is that it isn't as cut and dry as some people might think it is.

There are many stay at home advocates that will tell you that it is better for the baby. The National Institute of Child Health and Human Development did a study in 2003 that found that kids who spent all day in daycare had higher levels of stress and more aggression than kids cared for at home. Some experts believe that any consistent, quality caregiver could give the emotional stability needed for children to have lower levels of stress and less affression and that that care doesn't have to come from the parents to yield those results. Another plus in being a stay at home mom is that you get to be there to see all of their "firsts," and you don't have to hear about it from a caregiver. One aspect of being a stay at home mom that particularly appeals to me is that you can raise them how you want and teach them things you want them to learn.

Some stay at home moms feel like they are loosing part of themselves or at time their sanity. This is something really important to consider.

An important aspect to consider is the money situation. For many families it is cheaper for a parent to stay home and not pay for daycare. But with the economy the way it is and more and more single parents out there, working for some is not an option.

It also goes beyond money reasons why some mothers decide to work. Some mothers say they need to work in order to keep their sanity or to be good moms.

The main pros of being a working mother is that they can keep their identity and "self." Unfortunatly, no matter how far our society comes women will always be judged on the aspect of how well they are able to raise and take care of their family. It is hard for working mothers to spend a lot of times with their kids as they would like. Cooking home cooked meals and doing stuff around the house on top of everything else sometimes can feel impossible.

During th e tough economic times that we are in now, some husbands of stay at homes moms are being layed off and it is falling to the women to go back to the workforce and take care of the family. Many moms that stay at home work from home.

I personally stay at home with my children, but I am always working on something to contribute to the family. I guess I would be labeled a work from home mom. I said this before in round one of "The Mommy Wars," as long as we are doing what we feel is the best things we can for our children then thats all that matters. There are no 2 situations that are the same and no 2 families that are the same. Each situation and family warrants it own individual decision. If at the end of the day our children know they are loved, if they are happy and their need are taken care of then you have done enough and everything is ok.

Here is a video found that I found. I love the Momversations and look out I am going to be posting them periodically.


Anonymous said...

This is truly an age-old debate; however, now there are so many opportunities for moms to earn income from home, that the debate may become obsolete! Of course, you should always do your research first before trying to start any home-based business. I spent 6 years looking for opportunities to earn real income from home and it took me until my son was 15 before I was able to do so. There are some great companies out there that will pay you by the hour, if you don't mind having a set schedule, to work right in your own home office. There are also many companies that do business through independent reps; however, you might find you have to purchase inventory and do home parties--not always the best option for moms with small children or single moms with no babysitter options. Consider, though, that just because you have to invest some money, that doesnt' necessarily mean it is a scam. I don't know any "brick and mortar" business that start for free, and have $0 overhead. Just be sure you're not asked to PAY before you ever find out what you're getting into, and make sure there are no 'hidden charges' in the fine print. And when reading "testimonials" it always the same people? Is the product or service a "luxury" item, or a product/service that is a necessity? I finally found the perfect thing for me, I can set my own hours, and I am helping folks, and its minimal investment. Just wanted to comment becuase there are great opportunities out there, but for every ONE there are a thousand scams! Just be careful and be patient, but you CAN be a stay at home mom, and still earn income!

Angiefairbanks on July 3, 2009 at 3:25 PM said...

Thanks for the comment, thats really great advice for all the gals out there looking to contribute to the family.

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